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Fickle Fates
Direct Answers - Column for the week of April 19, 2004 I am currently involved in a wonderful year-long relationship with a man I've known for ten years. We dated briefly all those years ago, but I wound up marrying someone else. To make a long story short, I should have listened to the fates back then. Recently I was contacted by another man I dated briefly right after high school. Our relationship ended in a gross misunderstanding. I thought I was getting signals from him to get lost, so I did. I was very hurt, and I have thought about him many times over the years. I found out in a recent meeting that I got the wrong signals and he has always been in love with me. During this meeting the chemistry was very strong, but I would do nothing to betray my current boyfriend. You should also know I moved several times during that time period, and I believe he was looking for me but could not find me. My problem is making a decision. I've compared the two, and I keep coming up with a true feeling of torn. I've done the pros and cons paperwork only to find each has the same amount of qualities I love. If I let one go, I will most likely spend my life wondering. One is wine and roses, the other is picnics and wildflowers?and I like both. Penelope Penelope, in ancient Greece people listened to the fates by going to the temple of Apollo at Delphi, and asking the Delphic oracle for advice. The oracle would inhale the vapors from a cavern in the temple, enter a trance, then make a prophecy. The most famous prophecy was to King Croesus, who asked if he should attack the Persians. The oracle ambiguously said, "If Croesus attacks the Persians, he will destroy a great empire." Croesus thought this was favorable advice, but when he attacked, the great empire he destroyed was his own. Last year some scientists published a paper suggesting the vapor in the cavern at Delphi was ethylene, a compound which produces the same effect as "huffing," sniffing glue or paint thinner. In your case, we suspect the fates have been both speaking in riddles and sniffing glue. Your feelings for neither man are strong enough that you could marry one without regret. Marry no one until you feel love without doubt. Wayne & Tamara Second Time Around I am a 22-year-old female having a ridiculous problem getting over the fact my fiance was married before. We recently became engaged, and now the issue has become even more magnified for me. It upsets me to the point I'm afraid I might just tell him to forget the whole thing. Aside from this, he is a really great guy and we get along terrifically. But I cannot get over the fact I am not the first person he's felt this way about. It cheapens it for me. When I remember he has already spit out vows for someone else, has already had wedding night sex, has already gone on a honeymoon, I don't feel special. When we are at his mother's apartment, which used to be his apartment with his wife, I get filled with anger and start being mean to him. This is totally unfair. Even typing this makes me feel like a jackass, but I seriously can't help it. Jackie Jackie, a song made popular by Kathy Mattea says, "You've got to sing like you don't need the money, Love like you'll never get hurt. You've got to dance like nobody's watching?" Everything, according to the song, must come straight from the heart without reservation. You have a reservation about your fiance, and it is something he can never change. You are latching on to his past to stop something you don't wish to occur. We would not dismiss your reservations. Neither should you. Wayne & Tamara About The Author Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com" target="_new">www.WayneAndTamara.com. Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.
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Encouragement--Heart At Work Encouragement can have a very powerful effect on bosses and co-workers. The literal meaning of the word, encourage, is to put heart into. The Beauty of Life "An unexamined life is not worth living."-- SocratesI have just finished reading a most astounding statement from A. Experiences in My Life Prompted Me to Never Give Up Many people think that their life is a disaster that for some reason they cannot go on, they allow depression to creep in and continually give themselves negative bio-feedback. But you can over come and adapt and achieve anything you want in life. Favorite Quotations... What Do They Say About Us? Have you stopped to think what your favorite quotes are saying about you and your life experiences?How you relate to them? How they relate to you?Today.. The Art of Forgiveness Forgiveness is a critical element in becoming self actualized and fully loving. Forgiving is the process by which you let go of feeling victimized or having wronged others. Just One Person We All Need I understand that all the self made people of this world, be it:the late Abraham Lincoln, former President of the United States, who failed at most levels in his early life. This can de-motivate even the strongest people in the world, but he continued and became the President. Inspired Intuition - Following Your Inner Voice "Some people call the still, small voice insight or intuition?Our insight is a gift from God, not to be taken lightly or for granted.. Anamchara - Living An Essential Life What is essential in your life? This question contains one of the most important words an question can address. This is the word "essence. Go On ! Give your Enemy a Hug Another preposterous idea from yours truly, even the thought makes some people shudder.My husband had been having difficulty with an old mate, whenever he met him there were sneers and snide comments. Contemptable Temptation Let's look at the lesson we should all pay attention to in the Bible, the flight of the Israelites from Egypt. Was their escape through the Red Sea merely an exploit by God or was there some other signifigance to this act?1 Cor. Timepieces Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 2, 2003I am a father of three teenagers. The older boy and girl are obedient, good at their studies, and helpful around the home. Shaping the Future with Positive People Power We must shape the future and control our destiny.When we examine our world, what do we see? At this moment, we see mass unemployment, a shaky economic system, 'haves' and 'have nots', corporate dominance and a system of living which is getting worse every day. Switch to a Better Channel! Peril, catastrophe and disaster.These are our friends, allies and mentors. 4 Abundant Ways To Add FIRE To Your Passion! How many times have you found yourself dreaming you were more passionate?What makes certain people so passionate? How come they seem to be on-fire for their cause? Why do enthusiastic people become leaders we are willing to follow?Maybe you once had a burning desire inside of your heart. If you have ever hoped to add more fuel to the F. Go Between Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 16, 2003I enjoy reading your column every week. I want to tell you about a family problem I am having at present. Lisas Christmas Lisa was born into a loving Christian family and went through life knowing of The Lord and his supreme sacrifice. She was accustomed to Amazing Grace each Sunday and saying grace before meals. Live the Adventure! Think of an adventure that you might like to take. Maybe it is a trip to a foreign country or a major destination in your own country. Happy Ending I'm writing to you with a completely shattered heart. I've known my wife for over five years, and we got married last August. A Bit Of Turbulence Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 1, 2002I'm a 26-year-old flight attendant engaged to be married in 10 weeks. Our wedding reception was to be held in a marquee in my in-laws' garden. Work In Progress: 10 Benefits of Not Knowing It All 1. You can relax and enjoy your life more if you don't expect yourself to have all the skills, knowledge, and wisdom to carry you forward into the future.
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